Trauma and the Brain (Or: What Are We Doing Here?)

When I was younger, I loved Pinky and the Brain. Like… obsessed. I still watch old episodes to this day and laugh like I haven’t already memorized the script. Something about Brain waking up every single day like, “The same thing we do every night, Pinky…” with full confidence knowing good and well it didn’t work yesterday really used to take me out.

Looking back, I think that show shaped my interest in the brain. Because if you really think about it… that’s the brain. Same patterns. Same loops. Same attempts to make sense of things, over and over again. And sometimes… the plan doesn’t work. But your brain? She’s still going to try.

In my last post, I talked about burnout. Not the cute kind. Not the “I need a spa day” kind. The kind where you’re sleeping too much but still tired, eating your way through your pantry, calling off work, irritable, off your routine in a way that makes you look at yourself like, “Now hold on… what’s going on?” And then having a professional confirm it someone telling you something you literally tell your clients Monday through Friday and you sitting there like, “Oh… so we doing this for real?”

And to be so real, I felt a little shame. Because in my head I’m like, girl… you know better. But that “you should have known better” voice? That voice is loud. And it is also wrong. Because knowing something and living it are two completely different things.

And that’s where trauma comes in. Because trauma doesn’t just sit in your past like a memory you can pull out when it’s convenient. It lives in your body. In your reactions. In your habits. In the way your brain tries to protect you before you even realize you need protection.

Trauma can inform you, but it does not get to control you.

That’s the difference I’ve been sitting with lately. Because a lot of us think healing means getting to a place where nothing affects us anymore. Where we’re calm, regulated, unbothered no matter what’s happening around us. That’s not real. Especially not right now.

Because the world? The world is doing a lot. Every day feels like a Boondocks episode that didn’t need a second draft. Like somebody hit “publish” on chaos and just let it ride. And part of me is like… what the hell is actually happening? And the other part of me is like… 93% of us told y’all. But anyway.

We are human. We are going to feel what is happening around us. Fear. Frustration. Anger. Confusion. That doesn’t mean something is wrong with you. That means your brain is doing exactly what it was designed to do take in information and try to keep you safe.

But here’s where it gets tricky. If you don’t understand what your brain has learned from trauma, you will think your reactions are just “who you are.” You’ll tell yourself, I’m just anxious, I’m just sensitive, I’m just overthinking, when really your brain is responding based on patterns it built to survive.

And then you add burnout on top of that. Now your brain is tired. Your body is tired. Your coping skills are stretched thin. So everything feels louder. Everything feels heavier. Everything feels like it might be too much. And instead of saying, “I’ve been carrying a lot,” we say, “What’s wrong with me?”

Nothing is wrong with you. You are responding to a lot of input.

Trauma informs you. It tells you, this is familiar, this is not safe, pay attention. And sometimes it’s right. But sometimes… it’s responding to something that is not actually happening in the present moment.

That’s why I keep coming back to mindfulness. Not in a “sit still and be perfect” kind of way, but in a “where am I right now?” kind of way. Being where my feet are planted. Not where my anxiety is trying to take me. Not where my past has already been. Not where the world might go next week. But here. Now.

Because if I let everything I’ve experienced and everything that’s happening right now take over… I will lose myself in it.

So I’ve been practicing something simple. Not easy. But simple. Noticing. When I’m overwhelmed. When I’m irritable. When I’m reaching for food, sleep, distraction, anything to quiet the noise. Not judging it. Just noticing it.

And then asking myself: what do I actually need right now?

Sometimes the answer is rest. Sometimes it’s turning the news off. Sometimes it’s laughing at something stupid. Sometimes it’s texting a friend. Sometimes it’s just saying, “This is a lot… and I’m doing my best.”

Because healing is not becoming someone who never reacts. It’s becoming someone who understands their reactions.

Trauma can inform you, but it does not get to control you.

And right now, that looks like letting myself feel what’s real without letting it take over everything. Letting the world be what it is without letting it define my entire internal state. Trusting that I can move through this without abandoning myself in the process.

I’m still tired. I’m still coming out of burnout (ish, ya girl is in the deeps of it). I’m still figuring it out. But I trust myself a little more now. To notice. To pause. To choose differently when I can.

And in a world that feels like it’s doing entirely too much… I think that’s enough.

If you’ve been feeling off lately not broken, not dramatic, just… off this might be part of it. So take a second. Check in with yourself. Not who you think you should be, but who you actually are right now.

And meet her there.